That's why I'm sitting here soooooooooo sleepy in my car... taught 2 microcomputer applications courses so far today .... but got an Access Queries tonight so couldn't pack it in and go home after - even though I REALLY REALLY REALLY want to....
I am too tired, stressed and just overall done to care about teaching night classes right now.... money is one thing, but honestly right now I just don't care.
D. is still hanging in there.... keeps spiking fevers and 'forgetting' how to drink though .... very hard to keep her hydrated... and even when she is not totally out of it, coughs and chokes on pretty much everything we give her...She's at the point now where she just detests having us change her or do anything, really ... have to change her position every 2 hours, and she'll moan or say "Owwwwwwwwwww!" ... sometimes before we even really DO anything. Its distressing for all of us... but of course, it has to be done... getting so that it's a 2 person job just to turn her.
Spoke to R today though - new case manager called and is encouraging us to take advantage of the additional resources that are available to us.... i.e. 40 hours of home care (we've been running on 18/week for several years now), plus the nursing care, plus ...whatever.... I am under orders to figure out what i want to do with them but honestly right now I just can't think to work out what the best schedule will be for them.... have to have a plan for them before I leave for work tomorrow (at 7) ... guess I'll have to sort that out when I get home.
Everyone keeps going on about the need to 'relieve my stress' .... truth is that I find it a lot less stressful to be at home seeing to her right now than i do to be at school trying to concentrate. It's somewhat better now that I've covered off V ... got PSWs on the evenings I work late...and they are great...don't have to worry about the care she's receiving when I'm not there... but still... my concentration is shot and I can read and study all I want to - it seems as though nothing much is sticking in my brain. It is very frustrating .... and I have a paper due on Tuesday ...and giving a seminar next Friday and... and... and....
Im tired.
7 years ago
1 comment:
One step at a time because I think one day at a time is too much just now. Thinking of you often and wish I could do something to help out but the timing is off just now. Wish I could offer more than moral support but best I can do just now. Take care of everyone AND of yourself.
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